Why are we SO obsessed with perfection?
And WHO have we given the power to set that standard?
We live in a world where there’s a perfection checklist and we obsess with whichever box we can mark. EVERY ONE of us checks at least one box daily! Many are in a constant competition to check as many boxes as possible. (#Goals).
We obsess over physical appearance. Weather it be facial features (if not accepting of natural born, we seek surgeon altered and rely on the vision in our minds to be sculpted on our facial canvas). **Side note** DO you know that regardless of your DNA, your body, especially your face is genuinely sculpted by your atmosphere and your personality? The very facial expressions that make you YOU, are the ones that exercise the muscles and tone in your face. The more you exercise those muscles, the more specific your face gets. A surgeon cannot duplicate facial personality. However, they can create a visualization based on your description.
We obsess over skin (color, texture), and we use that as categorization and status. Those born darker are viewed as lesser species than those born lighter. However, those born lighter yet can “choose” darkness (tan) are viewed as more appealing. We want the facial wrinkles gone but neglect the natural progression of human skin. Then we cover it with makeup and potions. We want blemish free, smooth, hairless skin.
We obsess over hair (length, color, volume, texture). Even to the point that we have actually pass LAWS telling other people how they may not wear their hair! We actually obsess over the follicles growing out of someone else’s head, while ignoring the fact that many cannot even grow hair or have lost majority of their own hair. And we approve of the illusion of “approved” hair. Then there’s the eyebrow obsession!!! Two patches of hair stuck near the top of your face and we obsess over perfecting them!!!! It’s HAIR… It’s….. HAIR….. HAIRRRRRR!
We obsess over height, weight. It is desirable to be taller, but when asked my cousin about life at 6’8″, he would just look at you and duck as he enters a room. Just imaging spending your whole life dodging doorways, going to specific shop that sell your size. We obsess over a weight chart that tells us what should be a desirable weight. Two people of the same height can weigh the same but the use of their body has the weight distributed differently, yet we have been conditioned to judge ourselves one against the other to determine which body is “closest to perfect”.
We obsess over behaviors like how we walk. How many times have you walked into a room and thought, I must walk up right, don’t lean, don’t “walk funny”? I have been told that I prance when I walk. I can see that. But that prance comes from concentrating on getting where I am going without stumbling. And from being elated to walk again after breaking my leg and having to re-learn to use that leg. After the accident, I was on a walker, then a boot, then a limp then a slow walk and have progressed into a “gait” as some call it and I can wear heels again!!!! While You watch the WAY I walk, I am just glad to be ABLE to walk again. I dated a man who said he had a limp when he walked. I knew he had been in an accident and I knew it did some damage to his body but in all the years I knew him, I never saw a limp. I always liked his walk. It was in my eyes a confident swag and I found it attractive. The things we obsess about, others view differently…
We obsess over the way we talk, the language we use, not acknowledging that every physical tongue is different. Everyone’s brain process things differently. The way we hear, process and repeat sounds are different. If I write read and read, same word is pronounced two different ways. Why cannot dialect be accepted the same? If you close your eyes and listen to babies, you will begin to differentiate between them. They may have different tones, different rhythms, but they are singing the same song. They can communicate what they want without changing to mimic that of the other baby. All that baby knows is how to use HIS voice to communicate HIS need. Until he is older and conditioned to communicate differently.
We obsess the job we choose, often choosing a job of status rather than a profession of fulfilment. WE obsess over the possessions we acquire, Reaching for name brands or flashy, catchy items then we obsess over “protecting them”.
We obsess over the “name” we are given. Our…. NAME….. Name…. the title that we are given at birth, the compilation of letters and sounds that we answer to when we identify that someone is addressing us specifically. Our….. Name… we obsess over a Name and what we consider acceptable to call and be called… a Name!!!!! We don’t care that edibles are called Kumquat or Cucumber, Pickle or Turmeric. We don’t care that you call it a sedan or a limousine, a bike or a rollerblade… all these are funny sounding words to me! We accept all of that, but we obsess over someone named Jaquesha or Ladarion, Quintesha, or Ubunfu**. It is perfectly acceptable to name a girl Violet or Rose like the flowers but frowned upon to name a child Mercedees after a vehicle… Why do we make ourselves council over what is an acceptable…. NAME…. a complication of sounds and syllables that you chose to respond to… a…. NAME. I personally would love to have named my child after a musical note. I believe music is the love language. But it’s much too difficult to translate a musical note into language.
We obsess over where we were raised, where we were educated. As if we had a choice and as if that makes us more important.
What kind of car we drive, what garments we choose, what type devices we have.…. (The label of another person/entity draping us as if we made them ourselves, wearing our OWN names). And the list goes on and on…
My question is this: After you’ve checked off your list of perfection, When you close your eyes, When you feel your breath, When you lay awake, Are you happy now? Are…. You…. PERFECT?
~”In pursuit of a perfect society, what’s being lost along the way?”